Born or Made?

I don't always feel like I was born to be a mother. I always wanted to be one. I feel as though I was molded into the job though. I feel like I very rarely know the right answer or what to do in situation x, but I make it up as I go with mostly good, sometimes not so good, results.

Other women I know, well it seems as if they were born ready with all the answers and actions. There is no second guessing their decisions. Of course they were right to work or stay at home. Of course they know how to cook and are very good at it. Of couse they put their faith in the midwife and homebirth, complications and high risk are not in their vocabularies. Yes it is right to shop at Big Box. Yes only the food can come from Whole Foods.

Then I stop. I don't see them in their human moments. Their moments when the baby has thrown up in their unwashed hair while their dog is tearing apart toilet paper in the bathroom. Their moments when, even though they only shop at the Farmer's Market, they are at Big Box at 2 am in their pajamas and glasses with no make-up buying up Sugary Flakes on sale in plastic bags.

I don't harbor under the delusion that anyone is perfect. And I certainly don't think those that know or don't know me think I am one of these women, born to mother. So I was made into a mother, a good mother. So what? Does it make me less of a mother? No. The love is the same, no matter what.