It's Not Easy Being Green

We've been trying very hard to appreciate nature this year and take care of it. Call it an unofficial resolution. Since the grocery stores we shop at have been selling canvas grocery bags for a ridculously low price, we picked a few up. We also began using the Green Works products:which we love. But there are a few things we have to be ambivalent about.

For one is disposable diapers. Before Shelby was born, I looked into cost and environmental impact of disposables vs cloth. The deal was in our case, price was less for disposables and the water usage factor for laundering cloth diapers equaled out with the landfill factor of disposables. I also found out that there are some (although not by any means all) unscroupulous cloth diaper services that use environmentally damaging chemicals in the laundering of those diapers.

I also know that it is better to eat pastured beef and chicken. And they do taste better. However, they are very hard to find in our area being that I live in the center of hog country. I would have to order online and pay a whole lot to get this kind of meat. Unfortunately, it's not in our budget right now. If we lived in an area where there was a local farmer offering these things, I would love to get them and take the shipping factor and thus some of the price off, but for now, I'm stuck.

One of my favorite television shows is King of the Hill. In one episode, Bobby has a teacher (voiced by Paul Giamotti) who has the kids on a conservation/environmental kick. They even have an environmental court where offenders have to appear. When Hank extols clean burning propane, the teacher points out that propane grilling perpetuates the outdoor barbecue which in turns perpetuates the usage of disposable paper plates, cups and plastic utensils. Which brings me to my most troubling catch-22. With a drought in my area and water conservation front and center, washing dishes and running my dishwasher uses a lot of water. But the paper/plastic utensils we use to avoid this excess water usage fills up landfills. What's a green girl to do?

The argument of going green is very complicated. While I fully believe that God wants us to be a part of nature, not apart from it, I struggle with how is the best way to do it.

My Little German Baby

Shelby doesn't say the word "No!" yet. Now, for those of you insanely jealous out there, she does have her ways of letting us know she means business. And lately, when she is mad, or doesn't want to do something, she shakes her head furiously and yells, "Nein! Nein! Nein!" So, she may not be saying no yet, but she can say it in another language.

My Hero

This, for those who are not cultured in the way of excellent Disney Pixar films, is Elastigirl. aka Helen Parr. She is the mother of an incredible family of super heros. When Brad Bird created her as part of the movie, he wanted a female superhero that embodied the superhero qualities of all moms. Elastigirl can twist and stretch into any shape. Most moms I know can do the same. We manuver and change and stretch our personalities, interests and time to be the best moms we can be. So here is my hero, a mom no different than any other mom. Thanks Brad Bird.

Is It Spring? Or is Nature toying with my emotions?

The last few days it has been 60+ degrees outside. The calendar says spring starts around the 20th-21st of March. This year, I hope it is right. Don't get me wrong, I'm a winter girl through and through. It's just that having a one-year-old gives you a whole new appreciation for the outdoors and how if a stick gets broken, it's not the end of the world. Not like an appliance or a plate or something else.

Hey Jealousy!

My post yesterday made me start thinking about jealousy. It's a pretty wicked thing. Envy, after all, is one of the seven deadly sins.

It is also against the ten commandments. "Thou shalt not covet,"...

But how often are we happy with what we have. We are living in a society where we are always told we should reach beyond to the next level before we even have the time to appreciate what we have now. We have somehow lost the ability to see what is good in our everyday lives as they are not as they could be.

Now, I am not saying that we should teach our children not to achieve and work to the best of their abilities. But I do think we have lost the connection with what it means to be content in what we have. In what God has given us. How do we reclaim that? I plan on spending a lot of time figuring that out.

Born or Made?

I don't always feel like I was born to be a mother. I always wanted to be one. I feel as though I was molded into the job though. I feel like I very rarely know the right answer or what to do in situation x, but I make it up as I go with mostly good, sometimes not so good, results.

Other women I know, well it seems as if they were born ready with all the answers and actions. There is no second guessing their decisions. Of course they were right to work or stay at home. Of course they know how to cook and are very good at it. Of couse they put their faith in the midwife and homebirth, complications and high risk are not in their vocabularies. Yes it is right to shop at Big Box. Yes only the food can come from Whole Foods.

Then I stop. I don't see them in their human moments. Their moments when the baby has thrown up in their unwashed hair while their dog is tearing apart toilet paper in the bathroom. Their moments when, even though they only shop at the Farmer's Market, they are at Big Box at 2 am in their pajamas and glasses with no make-up buying up Sugary Flakes on sale in plastic bags.

I don't harbor under the delusion that anyone is perfect. And I certainly don't think those that know or don't know me think I am one of these women, born to mother. So I was made into a mother, a good mother. So what? Does it make me less of a mother? No. The love is the same, no matter what.

A Break, what's a Break

...it's what you take for, oh, say four months while chasing after various jobs and raising your family.

That's all I have to say for the last four months.

Shocking as it may be, I don't feel a commentary on how my family spent Christmas or how I changed over the last four months is necessary.

Today, my husband and I celebrate our fifth anniversary. Five years. Years filled with happiness and sadness, better and worse, sickness and health, babies and death. Years that moved us into our first home and new jobs and made us parents. I could say something trite like it doesn't seem possible, the fact is not only is it possible, it is reality.